Madison but also Moodle/Pansexual/She Her/Ready for the Revolution/Lets love everyone and fight against the system/
A lesbian couple gets a shocking surprise one day when God (played by Laverne Cox) shows up at their door. Upset at how humans had turned her message of love and acceptance into a message of hate and discrimination, she decides it’s time to send Jesus back to earth and wants the lesbian couple to raise Jesus. Hilarity ensues.
No need for homophobic or transphobic jokes when you can have exchanges like
“Ma'am your son turned the water fountain into wine again and got all the other students drunk”
“Jesus Christ.”
“….. I’m not sure if that’s suppose to be you responding to me or you requesting to speak to him.”
Also jokes about infinity-“Ask your mom”.
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
Mom #1: “Oh, I don’t know, sweetie. Ask your mom.”
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s?”
Mom #2: “I don’t know, have you asked your mom already?”
Kid praying: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
God: “Have you asked your moms already?”
OH MY GOD YALL ARE KILLING IT
Title: Jesus, Mary & Josephine
Mom #1: *stubs toe* God! Ow that hurt!
God: *appears* Mary tf you want this time?
Mom #1: Sorry, stubbed my toe again
God: this is exactly why I made saying my name in vain illegal
This Town Hung Up Pride Flags To Support A Lesbian Couple Whose Home Was Vandalized (x)
A lesbian couple gets a shocking surprise one day when God (played by Laverne Cox) shows up at their door. Upset at how humans had turned her message of love and acceptance into a message of hate and discrimination, she decides it’s time to send Jesus back to earth and wants the lesbian couple to raise Jesus. Hilarity ensues.
No need for homophobic or transphobic jokes when you can have exchanges like
“Ma'am your son turned the water fountain into wine again and got all the other students drunk”
“Jesus Christ.”
“….. I’m not sure if that’s suppose to be you responding to me or you requesting to speak to him.”
Also jokes about infinity-“Ask your mom”.
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
Mom #1: “Oh, I don’t know, sweetie. Ask your mom.”
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s?”
Mom #2: “I don’t know, have you asked your mom already?”
Kid praying: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
God: “Have you asked your moms already?”
OH MY GOD YALL ARE KILLING IT
Title: Jesus, Mary & Josephine
FUCKING YES
I kind of don’t care if I’m going to hell. This is hilarious, and I would watch it.
this totally made me think of this post
A lesbian couple gets a shocking surprise one day when God (played by Laverne Cox) shows up at their door. Upset at how humans had turned her message of love and acceptance into a message of hate and discrimination, she decides it’s time to send Jesus back to earth and wants the lesbian couple to raise Jesus. Hilarity ensues.
No need for homophobic or transphobic jokes when you can have exchanges like
“Ma'am your son turned the water fountain into wine again and got all the other students drunk”
“Jesus Christ.”
“….. I’m not sure if that’s suppose to be you responding to me or you requesting to speak to him.”
Also jokes about infinity-“Ask your mom”.
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
Mom #1: “Oh, I don’t know, sweetie. Ask your mom.”
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s?”
Mom #2: “I don’t know, have you asked your mom already?”
Kid praying: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
God: “Have you asked your moms already?”
OH MY GOD YALL ARE KILLING IT
Title: Jesus, Mary & Josephine
FUCKING YES
I kind of don’t care if I’m going to hell. This is hilarious, and I would watch it.
this totally made me think of this post
This needs to be in the show :D
Do you know how much it fucking annoys me that when I have safe search off and I search under the “lesbian” tag it’s 90% porn? Like, my sexuality is not a fucking kink, I get looking it up but i want to search lesbian’s tagging under the lesbian tag about something funny or relatable, not ‘lesbians’ fucking each other for the man behind the camera damnit.
I’m reading up on chocolate frog cards in the Harry Potter universe, for reasons, and-
“Came up with the ever changing floor plan.”
Really, Ravenclaw? Really?
“You know what this school needs? To not make any sense-”
“Rowena, I don’t think-”
“Exactly, you don’t think. I’m brilliant and this is perfect. Moving staircases, walls that think they’re doors-”
“But how will the students get to class?”
“They’ll have to figure it out.”
“…”
“Everyday. They will figure it out everyday. My students will live in a tower and navigate these stairs every time.”
“The stairs move! This doesn’t seem safe…I think I’ll put my common room in the basement, Rowena.”
“Ditto. I think the dungeons would be safer…”
“…My kids will brave these stairs. I’ll take the other tower.”
#Rowena snipes that ‘cunning’ means Salazar’s students should be able to handle the moving architecture#Salazar snipes back that ‘cunning’ means knowing when and how to avoid unnecessary bullshit#meanwhile Godric is just yelling PARKOUR! and Rowena is all That’s Not What I Meant#Helga would like her students to make it to class on time and without any broken bones#ninety percent of the reliable secret passages were a team effort by Helga and one of the others#to make sure the house elves could get around all right (via @mzminola)
#i feel like the collaboration was probably hufflepuff and slytherin#in the only time they ever worked together#helga: students and house elves can move safely!#salazar: more places to hide snakes#salazar is like we should make these accessible to people with no legs#helga is like i mean i agree but why are you being so nice about this#salazar is like no reason hey I’m just gonna make some of these rely on snake language for fun#do you think a fifty foot snake would fit in this passage asking for a friend (via @dinosauriaawesome)
i’m literally crying this is 100% what happened
(hey tumblr please don’t delete the previous people’s comments like you did the last time i added someone’s tags to a post mmkay)
No but that’s actually so clever okay like the people who live in the castle would get a general idea of the patterns and how to move around efficiently but like for anyone planning on attacking it would be impossible to infiltrate like how the hell do I attack the headmaster when I can’t even find the bathroom why the fuck am I in a chemistry supply closet okay these stairs went to the main hall but now I’m on my way to the broom closets holy fucking shit fuck leonard SAID the dorm was on the left of the three headed hippogriff but I’m here and it’s just a painting of a man with a donkey face is this a fucikgin joke leonard do you think this is funny because it’snot. its not okay siri how the hell do i get to the nearest anything “here is: the nearest painting” like fuck you siri
actually considering all this, the changing floorplan probably worked exactly as designed when it came to the battle of hogwarts in the late 90′s. the invasion was towards the end of the term, so the students, especially the renegade students in hiding, had the full term to master getting around the school quickly, quietly, and efficiently. the invading deatheaters were generally their parents’s ages, and hadn’t been back to hogwarts in several decades, if they’d even attended at all. so, while the adult invaders easily outmatched the adolescent defenders in strength and skill, hogwarts was a lethal maze to the deatheaters, while it was home to the kids.
rowena knew what the fuck she was doing.
Let’s pretend you believe there are only 2 genders. Even if you don’t believe it, get in the mindset. Act out the character, become someone who believes in only 2 genders.
Okay, you in the mindset? Good.
Let’s pretend there is someone walking by. You know they identify as Nonbinary. You seem them? Good.
Now, what does that do to you? I don’t mean like as in it stirs up angry emotions because it’s against your opinion, I mean what does it DO to you. Does that person’s identity hurt your life in anyway? I dont mean it hurts you as in it makes you grumpy that someone isn’t conforming to your opinion, I mean does it HURT you? Are they burning your houses down screaming “Boy and Girl aren’t genders!!”? Does their existence give you some kind of fatal disease? Does them saying “Please, use they/them pronouns” harm anyone?
No?
Then why do you care?
Why do you care what they identify as if they aren’t hurting anyone? Why does it matter what they do and what they are if it doesn’t harm anyone?
Same with Gays and Lesbians, they aren’t hurting anyone being who they are, so why should you care?
Hm, I’m going to guess you (if you’re still in character) mentioned something like “They’ll burn in hell for being a sin!! It’s against my religion!”. Okay, by your belief, they are a sin.
But is it your life? Are YOU the one being cast down into hell?
No?
Then why do you care?
If it isn’t your life and they aren’t harming anyone being themselves, then don’t care. Get your nose out of other people’s business. Everyone is trying to live how they want to, just like you, so why should you care what someone is/is doing if it doesn’t hurt anyone?
Opinions are Opinions. They aren’t a rulebook or a way of life. People have different opinions and that’s okay. That’s human, that’s life. You know what’s not okay? Acting like your opinions are law. Acting like your the messenger of our creator made to tell us how to think, act, and look. That’s being a douchebag.
Be Christian, be Muslim, be neither, be a Boy, be a Girl, be Both, be Neither, like Girls, like Boys, like everyone on the gender spectrum, like no one on the gender spectrum. Guess what? It’s your life!! You don’t choose what you are, but you can choose how you live with what you are!! Why not see the beauty of opinions and know that if people aren’t hurting other people then that’s okay! It isn’t your purpose in life to check everyone on what you THINK they’re doing wrong! We’re all human, isn’t that enough? Why not love each other? Why not look at our differences and instead of scorn them, smile and just think. Just think, we are the species on Earth with so many differences. We are all human, and yet we are all different. Isn’t that amazing? Isn’t that beautiful in some way?
Now, for anyone who wants to start discourse like saying, for example, “Oh Nazis are fine?”. No, they aren’t. They’re Nazis. I said a lot of times to just let people be themselves as long as they don’t hurt others. Nazis hurt people. Fuck them.
This has been my Tedtalk, I explained this poorly instead of doing an essay due in about 6 hours, thank you for reading if you made it this far. Go ahead and reblog or whatever.
you know, when i said i wanted the real world to be more like harry potter i just meant the teleportation and the butterbeer, not the entire plot of book 5 where the government refuses to do anything about a deadly threat so the teenagers have to rise up and fight back
Where is the outcry
Omg why!?! What’s is the point other than pure cruelty and disregard for human life
This is barbaric, how can you do that to a family? Especially with children… I feel sick to my stomach and angry as hell.
Barely 100 notes
We don’t care about poc lgbt at all don’t we
I’d like to spend time with gay men too tho. where’s my small beloved group of fun. kind. casual gays and lesbians
2 days after this post I got invited by a lesbian couple I just met to stay the night & watch Moana with them & my friend who’s a gay dude & another gay I just met so this is the gaypost, reblog to bring gay friends to you
